Fun and Games with the Mentally Ill

Therapy for me, Fun for you! My ideas, concepts, and general comments on the stupidity around me.


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Monday, September 22, 2003

Hello disappointed readers. Today being my 37th birthday, I decided I'd write a few things. Jesus, I didn't realize it'd been since August since I blogged last. Evidently, I've either been very busy or very lazy--or a combination of the both. I am adept at multi-tasking. Anyway, the reader's digest version of past events is as follows: both kids are on juvenile probation for domestic violence (against me), the State's case against the pervert who took my daughter's virginity is now before the Grand Jury (necessitating testimony--joy), still no word from my would-be horse farming so-called mother, and as stated before, I am now 37.

37. 37. That would mean I'm pushing 40 pretty hard, wouldn't it? Ordinarily, age doesn't bother me, but lately I've been thinking that I haven't done a goddamn thing with my life. Then I go lie down until I don't care anymore. I've been doing a lot of lying down the past couple weeks. One thing I have noticed as I'm aging not-so-gracefully is that my tolerance for stupidity is waning at an alarming rate. And I now have a weapon, so it's getting to the point where stupid people will no longer get a sign, they will get a bullet. I think it would be a good idea to fire two warning shots (into their heads) when they piss me off. Too bad you can't shoot telemarketers.

Another thought I had recently that I deemed necessary for sharing is my confusion about the English language we all know and sort of use properly. Did you ever notice that certain words should really mean something else? The one that came to my attention is "copulation." We all know this word is synonymous with intercourse, but I feel it should mean something different. It's against the law to impersonate a police officer, and since impersonation is synonymous with emulation, I believe that copulation is a better term for that particular transgression. Just my opinion...take it or leave it as you will.

On the animal front, my daughter brought home an orange and white kitten the other day, and I (being the sucker that I am for strays) allowed her to keep it. She is now rethinking the decision as the kitten is deciding when Kate should be up instead of Kate deciding when to get up. I went in this morning to wake her for school, and the kitten was literally jumping--with all four feet--on Kate's head. Most amusing for me, most annoying to Kate. You'll have that. Then again, karma reared its head a little later today. I had made chicken eggrolls last night and was eating leftovers for lunch. The kitten decided that eggrolls were the purr-fect food for her, and so she was licking my lips. I thought this was cute at first until I realized that she was just looking for the best place to chomp, which turned out to be in the middle of my lower lip. Nice. I knew there was a reason I don't like cats. =O) Ah well...the kitten got her just desserts yesterday as she tried to bat one of the ferrets who was inside the cage. She got bitten on the paw--about which she was most unpleased--and she's a slow learner, so I'm sure it will happen again. In case anyone is wondering, the dogs and the cat are getting along fine. The cat bosses them around, and they being the morons that they are, allow her to do so. This is also quite amusing.

One more thing before I go read George Carlin's Brain Droppings (it's a book, dummy), I have learned that drugs are our friends, and Xanax is now our best friend. It doesn't do much for the anxiety attacks, but at least I don't care when I have them. This has to be some sort of improvement.

Everyone behave as you see fit. I'll yak again when I have something pseudo-interesting to say. Later, gators.


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